totally speechless.today , called mac for breakfast.
then ibu ask to go weddings . first was at 110, it was my kindergarden cooker last time. her daughter got married . then , mama fetch us , and then to woodlands . my mood was freaking low, so i just watch people eat. the first wedding also , i watch ibu eat. then slept in car, woke up , and we were at geylang . then went home after that .
i got no mood, im hungry , but i dont feel like eating .
god, help me. misery just keep coming back.
you know what, i dont care anymore. i dont care about my fucking life anymore . see , this is the reason why i kept on having scars on my hands . its me ! who is freaking dumb. why . why must i make stupid decisions without thinking . i hate myself and i forever will . dont worry, it not because of you. its me . i fucking hate my life and even myself . yes, misery keep coming back , because of my ownself of making stupid fucking decisions to do this and that , that will make myself feel hurt , but thinking , i found my weakness already . i dont understand my own life . i dont understand me either . why must i live ? i am always surrounded with sadness and misery . fucking shit man , i hate my life . i just wish that everything will be alright . but will it ? i dont think so.
I FUCKING GIVE UP ON MY LIFE !
would like to thank SAGIRI TANEDA for calling me when actually zubair ask her to :)
because of SAGIRI , i wont be soo sad anymore , and i will eat .
i love you babe . thanks for being there for me .
